Factgirl

factual, friendly, fabulous!

Adventures in ….

February25


Poker

Well to start the week off, I was pretty stoked to take 7th int he 16k. I love the final table! Also it was rad like Crocket and Tubbs to win the WWdN tourney at Stars! yay!

Dear Bloggers who I put on tilt,
I hope we can still be friends. I understnd I am a donkey and am sorry you got near my hoofs.
hee haw,
facty

House work

So remember when I got my hair stuck in the vaccuum? Yeah that sucked (har har) and I vowed to get a maid after that. But I didn’t ever get around to it.

Yesterday was laundry day and I was doing the laundery and it was all going great until all of a sudden I went to change the loads and the laundry room smelled minty! “ahhh” I thought to myself, “My laundry room smells so fresh I feel as if I am swimming in a mountain stream!”

Thats when I opened the door and started taking the clothes out and noticed the black goo that coated the entire outside of the dryer barrel. then the sticky little balls in the bottom of the whole mess. gum. GUM. GODAMMIT.

What do you do in this situation? I grabbed my trusty windex and paper towels and started scrubbing. no luck. Then I fetched my Mr Clean Magic eraser that has gotten me out of so very many jams in the past… nope. DAMMIT. Then I remembered - the answer to all problems lies on the internet. I Googled “Gum Dryer” and lo there it was - the solution to all my worries:

“wet a couple of dryer softener sheets and gently rub the gum away. For more stubborn pieces, let the wet sheet lie on the gum and soften it up before removing it.”

Worked like a charm. Thank you internet moms!

Still, I am getting a maid.

PTA

That lady is still totally mad at me about the skirt. Whatever. But it is so weird to have someone who wont say one word to you or make any eye contact but is still hanging out around you. Today I told a story from my past and she rolled her eyes.

Note: You are not as subtle as you think you are. Maybe take a subtlety class in college or something if you want to do the eye rolling. Its not working for you at all.

The rest of the PTA is going awesome. We have the best ladies ever! I am very lucky to be following up one of the most dynamic can-do ladies int he world as president - it will make next year all the easier.

Kids

still cute and full of trouble.

Husband

Wha? I have a husband? Ok ok just kidding - we actually got to have a nice breakfast together the other day after he worked a 48 hour shift. No, thats not a typo.

Dear Full Tilt,
I want my husband back soon please. I understand you like him, but I like him too.
Factually, Facty
PS Thank you for inventing the 16k guarantee tourney -fg

Does My Fat Ass Make Me Look Fat?

February10


Sometimes when I get busy I forget to blog. So quit yer bellyaching here’s a post:

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Busy is a dumb word. Bizzy = Busy? Whoever invented English is lame.
Come to think of it Dumb is a dumb word. Silent e = good idea. Silent b = lame.

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A PTA lady got super mad at me today over a Girl Scout skirt for her daughter. Best comment of the whole blow up: “Well you have never done anything for me have you, Kate”.

Tip: Don’t ever say that, unless a) Kate has never done anything for you and b) You want to look super selfish and bitchy.

I hear Selfish and Bitchy is the new look for Spring though…

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February is seeming to suck for so many of my friends. Thank the FSM it is a short month. Let’s rock March like its 1999.

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That’s all you get for now my peeps. Haven’t been pokering lately cause of my cute kids and stuff. Back soon! mwa!

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